Talking About Depression
Talking about depression and depression awareness is so important. I wanted to share my experience of depression, what has helped and how to support yourself and others going through it.
It feels a bit yucky to talk about, a bit like admitting to something shows our vulnerability, however it brings comfort and and connectedness to know as humans we all feel and share the same emotions. Whether it is just arising naturally without a cause, or after a big high, of adrenaline, then a crash, or from a trauma or something awful happening, depression can and does arise.
How are you? People will ask as I feel the tears rising up and “I’m okay”, seems to be enough to bat people away, or for another question about something else to be asked.
Inside I know I’m not really okay, my head is fuzzy and I’m feeling out of whack.
Being naturally caring, it is often easier to simply focus on others, regardless of how horrible I feel and it’s easier to listen and support others instead of sitting in the darkness and dread.
What is this darkness anyway? It’s a quiet space of stillness, torment and oddness. I don’t feel myself and yet I just about function. I might forget things in the shop after paying for them. I might take longer to make decisions and I might seem more short tempered, irritable or quiet with my closest humans.
It’s as simple as sharing what is going on so people understand, rather than pushing them away or them feeling it is to do with them. It can be really simple, such as “I’m actually not feeling so great, I’m feeling flat and it has nothing to do with you, but if I’m a bit distant or not myself just know that”, or “I’m taking solutions and I know it will pass”.
Depression for me can look like, low feelings, re-playing a difficult time, feeling trapped, stuck, crying, feeling anger, unmotivated, lethargic and/or confused, these are just some of my experiences with depression. It may look different for you and it’s important to realise the signs, so asking yourself how am I actually feeling? Is this manageable? How am I functioning in my every day? Getting real with what your needs are and being brave to reach out for support is a real commitment to yourself.
When I know others are suffering, it has been a help to reach out to them, so they are given space, kindness and love to open up in whatever way they want to share. I have also found this a help, even if I didn’t talk about anything, it was an opportunity to feel some lightness and relief from the paralysing state and wanting to hide, as if its contained within you. For me there is such a slowness with depression that it takes more than just a “hi you okay” to be able to share about it, so knowing there are pockets of opportunity to share with someone close to you in a slower more gentle way, is such a support. Everyone opens up differently and don’t take it personally if they dont open up with you. There are also other ways to be together without speaking, playing a game, or doing something they enjoy, all of this will soften and soothe.
Reaching out to a loved one in a simple conversation of what is going on for you, is a beautiful first step. There is also a wealth of professional support available depending on what resonates with you. I am sharing my own experience of solutions, so it may not include what will or has helped you.
Homeopathy – I have a homeopath who allows me space to share openly and sends me remedies specific for my disposition, this really supports me emotionally and mentally.
Holistic Treatments – I receive treatments, such as Bowen and Reiki that work on lifting emotions, releasing trauma and offering the physical and energetic body with deep relaxation.
Self care – at home supports can include meditation, breath work and movement which really helps to allow things to shift and disburse. There are plenty of online offerings and apps that freely offer this.
We may know what supports us, but feel unwilling to take it, but sometimes we just need a reminder that there are easeful solutions available when you want help. The sooner you reach out, the more likely it will shift. Even if we had all the help in the world and we were unwilling to take it, we need to be the ones to want to say yes, I am ready to receive help.
If you are not sure what support is right for you, then you can ask someone that’s been there what has helped them. Muscle testing is also a great way at finding out what solutions are right for your body and mind in that moment. There are plenty of Kinesiologists which support in this offering.
I offer a 20 min chat, totally free, where I can listen openly in a caring way and help guide with offerings that could support your situation. I offer Mbit coaching and reiki remotely, which can really serve in feeling more ourselves, supporting in decision making, soothing overwhelm and encouraging relaxation. With my offerings and in my experience the best therapy has been finding nourishment for both mind and body.
I wrote this when I felt really low and wanted to share about it after passing through it. The more we openly share our experiences, the easier it is to realise our shared experiences of suffering and to find solutions together. So, with that said and to normalise, everyone feels low, depressed at times, its okay to feel this and there are so many solutions of support available.
Please be in touch if this resonates, or to receive further support.
Sending love Emily